A death in the family is one of life’s most difficult moments. For those closest to you, the grief can be overwhelming. And if you have named them as your Executor, they are carrying something even heavier: the legal and practical responsibility.
Here is the uncomfortable truth I have observed in my practice: Executors are almost never chosen for their legal expertise or financial acumen. For understandably reasons you pick the person you trust most. Your spouse. Your oldest friend. Your sensible sibling. These are the people you believe will do right by you and those you love. But the job they are inheriting can be one of the most arduous tasks anyone can be asked to perform.
Consider whether a professional should take the role
Before you even think about who to appoint, ask yourself whether it should be someone from your circle at all.
I regularly see situations where appointing a loved one as Executor creates tension nobody anticipated. A large or complex estate, multiple beneficiaries, specific bequests, estranged relatives, these situations can turn administration into conflict. Your most trusted friend may be entirely the wrong person for the job, not because they are untrustworthy, but because they lack the emotional distance to navigate the disputes that inevitably arise.
A professional Executor, typically a trust corporation or a law firm, brings objectivity. They can make difficult decisions without loyalty pulling them in different directions. They will not inherit a fractured relationship as the price of doing their job well.
If you do choose a family member or friend, make sure they genuinely have the mental and emotional fortitude for it. This is not about competence. It is about resilience. Can they handle conflict? Can they make unpopular decisions? Can they hold firm when relatives disagree?
If you appoint multiple Executors, keep the number manageable
Many hands can make light work. But too many cooks really do spoil the broth.
When you appoint multiple Executors, they must work together collaboratively. I have seen estates gridlocked for years because appointed Executors could not agree on basic decisions. If you are naming your three adult children plus your spouse, and two of them do not speak, you have created a problem.
Multiple Executors in different time zones may find it harder to coordinate quickly or resolve issues promptly. They need to be geographically close enough, temperamentally compatible enough, and genuinely willing to cooperate.
That said, appointing replacement Executors or a professional backstop is in any event sensible. Your named Executor might die before you do or become incapacitated. Rather than leaving everything to an outdated Will, having your lawyer or a trust corporation named as the successor Executor ensures continuity and expertise if your first choice cannot serve.
Two Executors can work well. Three starts to strain the arrangement. More than that usually creates paralysis.
Make your assets easy to find
This is the single biggest practical thing you can do to help your Executor.
Most people’s financial lives are a scattered mess. Bank accounts here, investment accounts there, insurance policies in a drawer, a bit of cryptocurrency through an app, property deeds in a cupboard, that rainy-day cash hidden in the house. Social media passwords only in your head. Your Executor’s job becomes exponentially harder when they have to play detective to find what you own.
Create a central document. List every asset you hold. Include where it is held, what your account numbers are, usernames if applicable, and the approximate value. Update it when things change. Keep it somewhere your Executor can access it quickly.
Your Executor is not Sherlock Holmes. They cannot distribute assets they cannot find. Without a clear picture of what you own, they will spend time in investigation. Your beneficiaries may sit in limbo, and the administration of your estate can be delayed significantly.
This simple step removes enormous stress.
Tell your Executor where your Will is kept
One of the biggest delays I see comes from something almost trivially simple: the Executor cannot find the original Will.
They have a photocopy. Your lawyer has a copy. But the original? Missing. And without the original, probate may be delayed or require additional proof. Beneficiaries cannot be paid. Everything grinds to a halt while your Executor searches.
Secure document storage exists for this reason. Your lawyer’s office. A safe deposit box. Somewhere fire-proof and secure where someone other than you can access it. And you must tell your Executor where it is. Write it down. Say it out loud. Make sure they know exactly how to find it the day you die.
This prevents weeks or months of unnecessary delay and stress.
Keep your Will current
A Will written twenty years ago may not reflect your wishes now. People change. Relationships end. Charities that have mattered to you emerge. Your financial circumstances shift.
Review your Will every few years. Do you still want to leave that asset to that person? Has your marriage ended? Do you have grandchildren now? Have you separated from the person you named as Executor?
An outdated Will can create serious problems. Your Executor finds themselves in an impossible position, administering wishes that no longer reflect your true intentions. Your beneficiaries discover they have inherited things you would never have wanted them to have.
Keeping your Will current removes this burden from your Executor and protects the integrity of your wishes.
The case for early Why this matters
A Will is not just a legal document. It is your final expression of what matters to you. A clear, well-organised estate plan tells your Executor exactly what you want. It protects the relationships between the people you love. It prevents delays, reduces conflict, and gives your Executor the confidence to do the job properly.
Your Executor is taking on an enormous responsibility at the moment when grief is heaviest. The small, practical steps you take now, keeping clear records, updating your wishes, telling your Executor where important documents are kept, will significantly reduce the stress and burden they face after you have gone.
Getting help
If you are a beneficiary unsure of your rights or an Executor navigating your responsibilities, we can help. Our Private Client team provides practical advice on Jersey Wills, probate and estate administration.